Thursday, May 29, 2014

The Chronicles of Moxie by Z.B. Heller


First impressions sure are fun where a drunk Moxie is concerned:
         "Hey, you!" I yelled. "Yeah, you with the tight a**. Do you have hairy balls or smooth balls?" I staggered out of the booth towards him.
         "Excuse me?" the Adonis said. His ocean blue eyes were gazing back at me and had me breathless. Well, I think it was on pair of eyes. Again, the alcohol was having an impact on me deciphering between human and alien.
       "Smooth or hairy? Lay it out for me," I slurred. The room looked like it was starting to sway a bit.
       "Umm, last time I checked I didn't think it was appropriate to talk about someone's balls." He smiled, playing along
I mean Miles that boy is just sarcastic as they come, "nah, that's ok. I'm just honored that I could partake in the very important bar poll about hairy balls. I can now die a happy man, knowing that I made a difference in the world." He's totally honest as well, "I don't want anyone else seeing you in this dress because I don't like the idea of anyone looking at how the dress curves around your sweet a**. Or maybe it's the fact that your ti*s stand out as if they are offering anyone to touch them." I mean the boy is just full of dirty thoughts where Moxie is concerned:
          "They're shoes, there's not much to imagine." I leaned in to whisper into his ear. "They have feet inside." 
           He turned his head so our lips almost touched. His eyes turned down to my lips. "I was imagining them swung over my shoulder while I have my head..." 
I never laughed so hard in my life reading this book and I loved reading it I need to find more books from this author, I loved their sense of humor. 

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